KONY 2012.

tickle me pink.

hello beauty queens.

{and kings}

so, remember how last year i took a leave of absence from school?

well, this year i've decided to take a leave of absence from life.

now you may be thinking,

'cecilia, that is simply impossible'

but to you i say:

it all depends on how generally you define the word life.

 because that life i was living a month doesn't belong to me anymore.

so i guess i'm taking a permanent leave of absence, and only traces of the past will join me in moving forward.

(i'm being vague because i'm kind of enjoying having fallen off the face of the earth, so to say, and i don't know if i'm ready to come back just yet)

so with all this change in scenery, i naturally am having a change in character as well.

the other day, someone asked me why i have such a strong desire to be unique.

her words were something like 'why can't you just accept your clichés?'

it's one of those things you never really consider, like the definition of the word curiosity.

 when i couldn't come up with a cohesive answer, i realized that she had a point.
what's important to remember is that cliché doesn't equal predictable.
and predictability is what i'm avoiding, simply because i don't want to bore myself.
but the predicament, you see, is that when you're worried about being too predictable, you end up premeditating everything and overwhelming yourself and becoming all too ironically...predictable.
so it all winds back down to that living in the now concept.
easier said than done, right?


so anyway, i was getting sick of my embarrassing "hello 2012" face and decided i had to post something new and this is what showed up on the screen.


if anyone would like to contact me i have a new email! it was time for a grown up one:
ceciliadmccollum@gmail.com
(don't miss the d in there)


i hope everyone's day is filled with love and vitality always.
xoxoxo

happy 2012.

don't forget to throw a little weirdness into this brand new year.

hot, right?

recently.

1. my gingerbread house.

2. mother-daughter love.

3. energy vs. sleep.

4. kate's gingerbread house in the making.

5. dance party.

6. jeff's gingerbread house.

7. maddy refusing to be serious during christmas card pictures.

8. paint by number, fantastic mr. fox, facer xmas card, candy & a best friend.

9. sammy's gingerbread house (complete with a graham cracker freeway and sour patch cars).

10. the christmas card.

11. jacob's "gingerbread" house.

12. christmas tree shopping.

13. alex's fallen temple gingerbread house.

14. a flocked tree.

15. the "coke room" (aka crushed candy canes) in sam's house.

16. maddy looking pretty.

11 songs in honor of 11 days left of 2011.

[somebody that i used to know] 

gotye feat. kimbra

[caring is creepy]

the shins

[amor fati]

washed out

[love love love]

avalanche city

[blood]

the middle east

[settle down]

kimbra

[i would do anything for you]

foster the people

[don't bring me down]

electric light orchestra

[welcome home, son]

radical face

[lights out, words gone]

bombay bicycle club

[remains of the day]

danny elfman

for your daily dose of laughter:

i have a project for anyone out there who has 2 minutes and likes to smile.

materials needed:

1) at least 1 silly band (s.b. for short)

2) pen

3) paper

4) glue (optional)

for this very complicated craft, you take your s.b. (whatever it may be) and glue it onto your piece of paper (if you're having a glue shortage, just place it on the paper).

next, you take your pen, and incorporate the s.b. into a scene.

whether it be a santa s.b. and you draw a chimney and reindeer around him, or just a bathing suit s.b. which you draw a body around (see fig. 22), is up to you.

FULL credit to ali mccollum for this little project. 

figure 22:

 

i hope you giggled a little. i know i did.

settle down.

"i tend to have an affinity towards things once familiar, now altered. when antiques see new incarnations, whether they become more modern, dark, slightly twisted….it is more than novel, at least for me. it’s my inner ballerina fighting with the want to not be a complete priss. i mean, i guess life isn’t just pink tutus and slicked backed buns?"

-dianna agron

i think i've found my kindred spirit. there's something about miss agron that's interested me from the start. when i came across her [website] i found out why. it's like she takes words from my mind and eloquently documents them for the world.

it goes right along with the ongoing list of contradictions that is life: wanting to be two different people.

 sometimes i find myself gravitating towards that hot pink pencil skirt, but other times it's the men's nightmare before christmas shirt. sometimes i'm dancing to my justin bieber singing toothbrush, but other times i'm refusing to pay $12 to go see yet another twilight...but you get the point. having gone to an all girls school, i'm not a huge fan of females, and i find this aversion to estrogen manifesting itself in my life when my few girl friends are out of town and i have to go shopping alone because all of my other friends are boys. i've asked one too many boys for outfit advice.

so, in comparison to all the males around me, i always end up feeling ridiculously girly. after all, i am the only one in a dress. but i must not be too prissy, or i'd never get along with them to begin with, right?

but i've also recently been immersing myself into 'the real world'.

you know, that one outside of la cañada?

i've found myself unsettled because i'm completely insecure about how i see myself in comparison to the rest of the world.

one day, i'm happy to be that girl who likes daisies and drives a red jetta.

but other days, i resent it, and gravitate more toward the darker parts of myself.

some days, i'm proud of the hardships i've faced and conquered, but other days, i wish i could hide them forever.

the conclusion i've come to is that i just need to settle down and accept that it's okay to tuck that jack skellington shirt into my skirt.
but more importantly, that outfit doesn't have to encompass my entire personality.
i'd hope i have more than just two angles.

it's hard to feel unique in this great big world. there are millions and billions of people out there who have this same battle with themselves every day. when i began to come into myself in high school and really think about things, i was always relieved to hear that i wasn't alone in whatever new thought i had on a given day. that's how best friends are formed.

but now, i have this nagging desire to be unique.

and it seems like it gets harder and harder every day.

but shouldn't it be the opposite when i'm the only one in the whole wide world who's seen everything i've seen, done everything i've done, and thought everything i've thought?

and then i realize that that cliché version of myself that i'm seeing is nothing but an image.

whether i'm the only one who stumbles across this image of cece from time to time, or it's countless people...

that's something that's completely out of my control.

my best advice for everyone is to remember that other people's actions are only reactions.

just as they have the power to control them, you have the power to control your own.

now go enjoy the last 11 days of 2011, lovebugs.

[photo credz].

for forever and a day.

the archipelago of kisses:

we live in a modern society. husbands and wives don’t

grow on trees, like in the old days. so where

does one find love? when you’re sixteen it’s easy,

like being unleashed with a credit card

in a department store of kisses. there’s the first kiss.

the sloppy kiss. the peck.

the sympathy kiss. the backseat smooch. the we

shouldn’t be doing this kiss. the but your lips

taste so good kiss. the bury me in an avalanche of tingles kiss.

the i wish you’d quit smoking kiss.

the i accept your apology, but you make me really mad

sometimes kiss. the i know

your tongue like the back of my hand kiss. as you get

older, kisses become scarce. you’ll be driving

home and see a damaged kiss on the side of the road,

with its purple thumb out. if you

were younger, you’d pull over, slide open the mouth’s

red door just to see how it fits. oh where

does one find love? if you rub two glances, you get a smile.

rub two smiles, you get a warm feeling.

rub two warm feelings and presto-you have a kiss.

now what? don’t invite the kiss over

and answer the door in your underwear. it’ll get suspicious

and stare at your toes. don’t water the kiss with whiskey.

it’ll turn bright pink and explode into a thousand luscious splinters,

but in the morning it’ll be ashamed and sneak out of

your body without saying good-bye,

and you’ll remember that kiss forever by all the little cuts it left

on the inside of your mouth. you must

nurture the kiss. turn out the lights. notice how it

illuminates the room. hold it to your chest

and wonder if the sand inside hourglasses comes from a

special beach. place it on the tongue’s pillow,

then look up the first recorded kiss in an encyclopedia: beneath

a babylonian olive tree in 1200 B.C.

but one kiss levitates above all the others. the

intersection of function and desire. the i do kiss.

the i’ll love you through a brick wall kiss.

even when i’m dead, i’ll swim through the earth,

like a mermaid of the soil, just to be next to your bones.

jeffrey mcdaniel

some kind of wonderful.

glamping \GLAM-pyng\ , noun;

1. glamorous camping.

well, my little turkeys, who else is glamorously camping this thankful holiday? apparently, this is the newest in trailer park lingo. and i do, so happen, to be in a trailer park. in sequoia, CA to be exact. as we all know, it's thanksgiving and we're supposed to be thankful. if you remember my 4th of july post, i hate holidays...but not this one. i mean, how can anyone not be thankful when they're glamping? seriously, thanksgiving is a glorious holiday. i get to bundle up in the cold weather i love, read scary stories by the campfire in weird accents, eat pecan and apple pie, and watch christmas movies (don't you just love the unique mccollum traditions). i just wanted to officially recognize this new favorite holiday of mine and also acknowledge that i am thankful i'm here for it, considering i almost got pillaged the other night.

story time:

on tuesday night, maddy ali & i went on a 10pm ice cream run and i left my phone in my mother's car.

well, i didn't realize this until 4am when i was going to bed (don't ask).

so in a fearless act, i headed out to the car in the dark to get it...

but my phone wasn't there.

and not only was it not there, but the car was ransacked.

at least the inside was.

the glove compartment was emptied out onto the seats, etc.

so i went back into the house thinking it was a messy act of one of the sissies in an attempt to find something.

when i woke up, though, i found out that it turns out the culprit was not a part of my family -

(s)he was la cañada's own bandit, and (s)he stole my phone.

but the key issue in this story is not the fact that my phone was stolen, but rather that i could've been out in the dark, at night, alone, moments after a random man/woman was rifling through the same car as me.

keeping in mind my addiction to scary movies, can you imagine how i assume the worst?

i am very lucky i'm not chopped into bits in a box floating down the la river right now.

but i'm also thankful for a few other things, those being:

the openness of my parents. i could be a serial killer and i know they'd still love me.

the weirdness of my sisters. i don't think there's anyone i'm less worried about judging me.

my pups for putting up with us dressing them in build-a-bear clothes.

sequoia for providing us with such perfect in-between weather.

and for whoever invented apple crumb pie.

so i guess i am thankful.

to [this song].

 [photo credz].

miss penny lane.

"never take it seriously.

if you never take it seriously, you never get hurt.

if you never get hurt, you always have fun, and if you ever get lonely, you just go to the record store and visit your friends."

-almost famous

words to live by.

[photo credz].

uh, cause it's worth it.

why today was a wonderful wednesday:

1. marcel the shell (with shoes on) has returned in a just as entertaining and endearing [sequal]. and, i got curious about the voice of marcel, just because it cracks me up so much, and came across some more of jenny slate's videos. [this one] had me literally laughing out loud with her answer. just thought i'd share.

2. i haven't charged my ipod in maybe about 2 weeks now. let me just tell you, that's a long time in my world. so i've gotten kind of sick of listening to my randomly assorted cds over and over and have finally accepted the radio. now, one of the only songs i actually enjoy on the radio right now is moves like jagger (along with the jazz station, but that's another story). seriously, i don't mean to be all anti-conformist over here, but if i have to hear another rihanna song i might just go crazy and go on a killing rampage. totally kidding. but back to the point, i have this new ritual of checking every radio station for moves like jagger when i turn on my car. no, i am not kidding. that is what rihanna's doing to me: desperation. so today, when i turned on my car, you know what the 2nd radio station i checked was playing? yep, you got it, moves like jagger. my heart skipped a beat. and it was even still on the whistles at the beginning. what else do i even need for a wonderful wednesday?

3. news flash: i got a job.

oh yes, it's true. i am the newest hostess at hill street café and i can't complain. everyone is nice and understanding of my newness to the job world. walking into work on wednesday felt like a milestone. well, as it so happens, hill street has some very loyal customers. and a lot of them happen to be over 60. i kind of love old people, so i'm okay with it. they really seem to understand the concept of taking pleasure in the details. so today an old man came in for a pick up order. i love pick ups because i get to run the credit cards and that's probably my favorite part of being a hostess, no shame here. this man was one of those that you just can't help but feel inspired by. he smiled at me and told me about how he and his wife were hill street regulars like all the rest, but she is very ill right now. so about once a week he comes in and gets take out for the both of them to bring back to her so they can eat dinner together, and so she can still have her hill street meal. my oh my, was i taken aback. i sound oh so cheesy, but that old man reminded me that maybe true love does exist. maybe there is a love affair that can last forever (mr. warhol). and someone else was telling him how sorry they were for his struggles, and he said something like "all you can do is everything you can". it's not exactly philosophically stunning, i know, but the way he said it with a smile struck a chord in me. i guess all you can do is everything you can.

4. so onto the post work festivities: e-mile. living the high life. my big purchase was strawberry pop tarts and a scratcher. this is only my second scratcher ever, mind you, and guess what...i won $4. yes, ladies and gentlemen, i am three dollars richer than i was when i walked into e-mile this evening.

5. i somehow ended up at the americana to see the movie immortal with geoff and juma. although i really enjoyed walking along next to the fountain, listening to sinatra and sipping my green tea with honey in a christmas cup, that is not the focus of this point. what we are focusing on is the amount of hot man arms in that movie. i'll be honest, war movies are not exactly my cup o' tea, but i learned something very important: hot arms aren't just for admiring - they're used for holding up the hot arms of other men to prevent them from stabbing you in the upper body and/or face. i can't tell you how many times i saw a scene like that tonight.

6. and finally, my last point is a foxy one. what really brought me joy during that movie was how every time athena came on screen, geoffrey james bywater the third felt compelled to say (at full volume) three words: what. a. fox. athena is now permanently burned into my mind as a fox.

sorry if i went into ramble mode, i guess i ramble when i'm happy after a

wonderful wednesday.